Wide awake at 4 am
Mortality obsession
Blank stare as I sleep where I stand
Existential depression
Life passes me by
As I wait around to die
I feel so lost, wandering blind
On an endless quest for a meaningful life
An endless quest for a meaningful life

I can’t take it, it’s keeping me awake
Poisoning my thoughts
Negative headspace
Waste what’s left of my limited days

Trapped inside this body
Trapped inside this mind
Cursed with full awareness that I’m running out of time
The energy i waste wishing I was never alive
Convinced existence is meaningless since one day I have to die
I know one day I’m gonna have to die

I’m not here with you now
I’m an old man in a hospital bed with tears in my eyes, I’m paralyzed, unable to move or speak
I’m not here with you now
I’m struggling to make it through the treatments as the cancer leaves my mind and body weak

Ruining my life
One thought at a time
Waste the days that I have left
Obsessed with my death

I can’t take it, it’s keeping me awake
Poisoning my thoughts
Negative headspace

Trapped inside this brain
Trapped inside this skull
Realize that my biggest fear is beyond my control
Spend most days too stuck inside my head to make a change
A slave to negativity, chained to all my wasted days

I’m not here with you now
I’m in a car wreck spinning out of control, it wasn’t even my fault, but there’s nothing I can do
I’m not here with you now
I’m fading fast, I go towards the light, but I know there’s no afterlife, no hope for me and you

Afraid to lose control
And let my grip on this life go
As cursed as I am blessed
With all life comes death

If I obsess with life like I’ve obsessed with death
Maybe my last thought won’t be one full of regret
If I obsess with life like I’ve obsessed with death
I close my eyes, I fill with pride as I breathe my last breath